The first and last love
by Lunschen
Summary: Cameron s thoughts about her love life.


A/N: This was written for the Unattainable Dreams' Prompt exchange challenge. It´s so much fun being a part of it! The prompt: First love. I hope youenjoy it_. _Btw I just own Jonas.

The first and last love

You´ve been always told that the first love is the most amazing magic in the world. It´s pure heaven in the beginning and it can turn out to be the most heart breaking thing when it ends. You´ll never forget it and although it ends badly most of the time, you´ll always appreciate this experience.

Looking through the glass walls of the hospital room, you look at your first love: Jonas Clarcson. He´s still in his hospital bed, surrounded by many different tubes but he´ll go through it. Jonas looks so happy in this moment and you don´t doubt that he really is. After all he got everything he ever wanted: A beautiful wife and two children, the perfect little family. Something you weren´t willing to give him. Still you remember your time together: Your first date in a small dinner when you were 16, your first camping trip together and the first time he made love to you. Back then you thought he would be the only one in your life, the one true love. You´ve always been so naïve… It ended when you were 18 and your biggest dream was to become a doctor instead of a mother. He was 23 back then and ready to be called a daddy. You´ve cried a river back then but went on and followed your dreams.

Some years later you met Daniel, your husband and it felt amazing to be with him. He made you forget Jonas in a second and this time you were more than sure that this would last forever. He shared your love for the medicine although he never been that enthusiastic about it like you. He wanted to make money and making you his little princess. It sounded nice back then but now you know it would have never lasted for long. You´re not born to be spoiled and hidden in a golden cage but you married him nonetheless, believing that you could make this work. Danny had so many dreams but they wouldn´t last because the cancer took him away from you and this world. It´s unfair but you learned to live with it although you will never really accept it. How can one accept the death of a young and hopeful man?

Seeing Jonas surrounded by his family makes you think of your own life and remembering the past. You could have been the one standing by his bedside with happy tears in your eyes and gently stroking his still weak hands. These children could have been yours but you chose against them. Maybe you´re selfish but somehow you´re not even disappointed. You´re content with your life and you´re more than happy that the team has saved Jonas.

Right now you´re even more than happy with your life. Although House is not your first love – the one and only love – being with him is even more exciting. You smile when you see him on the other end of the hospital corridor, forcing Wilson to buy him lunch. Of course he wins but before he leaves, he looks back at you and smirks that sexy little smirk that is meant just for you, letting you know that you´re on his mind. You still can´t help but blush and it makes him grin even wider. It´s been 4 months now but you still feel like a schoolgirl sometimes when he looks at you. Not that you complain…

You remember the first time you saw him at the job interview when Cuddy forced him to hire a woman. You were surrounded by many female doctors – all elegant dressed and so excited to meet the world greatest diagnostician. He didn´t even took the time to talk with all of them just stepped in the room and glanced briefly at every woman. Sometimes he rolled his eyes, sometimes he made a disgusted face or a mean comment and then he looked at you and stopped. You were never more nervous but when you looked him in his eyes, you both felt the sparkles between you two although he would never admit it. His gaze was making you feel naked and left you aroused to no end. You never felt like that after one look and you were his from this moment on. Some seconds later he walked towards you, nodded and told you to be on time tomorrow. Afterwards he left and you were the most hated woman in the room – and you loved the feeling. And so your work for Gregory House started – an arousing, depressing and exhausting time.

Your first night together has been like a dream coming true. You still remember how nervous but pissed off you were when you were knocking at his door. You´ve been pissed off of your feelings for him, of you both pretending that there was nothing between you although you could feel the sparks whenever you looked into his eyes. Just when the door opened, you stormed inside, telling him how idiotic you both were, how tired you were of this dancing around and that you´re having enough. The look on his face was priceless although you had not much time to focus on it since you kissed him senseless before he could throw you out – not bothering that he was your boss in this moment. Well, he kissed back and you promised yourself to never let him go away. You´re still keeping it by the way. Not much happened that night. You´ve been talking a lot and finally fell asleep in his arms – pure heaven!

You´re two are spending most of your free time together in his apartment. You´re both not ready to move together but you don´t feel the need to rush things. It´s great the way it is and you learned that until now he´s the only person who doesn´t want to change you and just loves you as you are. House respects that you don´t want children right now and he doesn´t calls you a selfish bitch for loving your job. He really shares your love for medicine and puzzles and understands it. You don´t have to be his pretty little wife but can stay who you are – Allison Cameron. It feels amazing to be yourself and still being loved. He understands what it means to be damaged since he is as well. You don´t want to fix each other but love each other – even without saying the L-word. You just feel it and that´s more than enough.

House may not be your first love but definitely last one.


End file.
